We received so many "thank you" letters in 2022 from obstacle course racing athletes who saw their love lives soar thanks to our previous dating tips. We're back to help out the rest of you...you obviously need it.
Date Do's & Don'ts:
♥ At the Park: Walk, don't run. Hold hands, not monkey bars. Sure, you need the practice, but you don't want to scare off your date...again.
♥ At the Movies: As you walk into the theater, the impulse to jump up, grab the top of the barrier wall, and climb over to your seat may be extreme. Do not do it. The entire theater will look at you like a you're a weirdo (even though you're awesome), and your date will leave before the movie even starts. (For those of you who try this now that I've planted the idea in your head, you're welcome, and don't get caught.)
♥ At the Restaurant: It's essential that you ask this question before any orders are made, "How do you feel about obstacle course racing?" If they say something positive, you can tell the server you're together for the bill. After all, you're just helping fuel someone else's race, and that's a beautiful thing. However, if they say something negative...let that dirty scumbag pay for their own dinner. This ain't no charity, and you certainly aren't Santa Clause.
Below are some tips for your dating profile...
4 Workouts Per Week
The Forge training program provides you with 4 workouts per week designed to improve your overall fitness for Obstacle Course Racing. Your strength, speed, and endurance will all be tested. Each week of programming will also help you improve your running and grip strength. It's time to forge yourself into the best OCR athlete you can be! Click the image or program title to learn more.
Here are some fire tips for your dating profile bio:
Don't Say: "I hit the spear throw every time." Impressive? Yes. But it doesn't fit here.
Instead Try: "I stay focused on the target and never miss." watch them swoon over your attentiveness.
Don't Say: "People love touching my booty." Even if it's only true because people were helping you over obstacles, it's better left unsaid.
Instead Try: "I'm strong, but sometimes I could use a helping hand." It shows you are capable, but sometimes you could use a boost. Everyone can relate to that.
Don't Say: "My ideal date is meeting up to run an OCR together."
Instead Try: "I love dirty dates." Your DM's will blow up. Deceptive...sure sure. But at least they'll go on the date, and maybe they'll get hooked on OCR as a result!
Don't Say: "I have amazing grip strength for any obstacle."
Instead Try: "I'll hold you tight and never let you go." Everyone loves a good hug. As the chorus goes, "If you love me, don't let go".
Don't Say: "My favorite obstacle at Spartan Race is Twister." Yes...but let's spruce this up.
Instead Try: "I'd love to play a game of twister with you." You are being 100% truthful. It's not your fault that you have a different concept of Twister than they do.
And yeah, don't forget, this is clearly satire. We have to say it because someone is going to take us seriously if we don't.
Here's a Facebook group for all you singles looking for an OCR love interest: Spartan Singles. Single or not, we'd love to help you reach your goals in OCR. Sign up for one of our training programs today! We won't let you down, even if your next date might.